I don’t dream about Bryan much anymore, and that’s unfortunate. He wasn’t even in many dreams in the beginning. When he was they were very disjointed and we were usually dealing with the fact that we had just broken up (?) or something else equally stressful. It was an odd way of interpreting him dying, …
So a funny (is that the right word?) thing happens when someone close to you dies. My theory is, in an attempt to take a mental break from the 24/7 pit of despair that is your brain, you tend to become obsessed with random and often obscure hobbies, habits, or tasks. For me, it’s MURDER …
This morning as I left for work my landscaper rolled up to conduct his usual bi-weekly lawn maintenance. I waved to him and anticipated the inevitable “Your grass is cut, you can pay me now” text (I’m paraphrasing). Like clockwork my phone pinged, however this time it was joined with the little passive aggressive shame …
I’ve done it! I’ve aged to 33 whole years! I can’t 100% say it’s been graceful, dignified, or that I’m looking forward to 33 more, but it happened. Generally 33 is not a milestone year by any recognized marker, but when you’re fresh into widowhood, friends and family tend overly indulge you on your birthday …
Mother’s Day 2018 was just a couple weeks ago, and I made my not-obligatory-but-really-obligatory-because-the-passive-aggressive-guilt-isn’t-worth-it-if-I-don’t-go trip home to Virginia. It was…fine. The weather was beautiful and brunch was delicious, but I couldn’t help but notice the overall air of melancholy I felt the entire time. The house was so quiet, the wifi questionable, and I felt …
…Is today! Shout out to all my widowed ladies, hollar!!! You know we keeps it mad real sans hubbies! Anyway, take a minute to reach out to the lonely hearts today and let them know they’re not forgotten. Also, while this organization is sometimes a little too touchy feely for me, they generally do good …
As I’ve said before, unless you’ve gone through the Titanic sinking-esque experience of your spouse dying, you’ll never truly know what it feels like to wake up every day after that contemplating death, hating everyone and everything, and constantly asking “what it is it all for?!”. I know, fun stuff right? But I’m not here …
Making things up since 1837. Contact me at sendittogordon [at] gmail.com
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Witty Commentary on widowhood
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